ON MARRYING YOUNG IN THIS DAY AND AGE

In my cyberworld readings, I've come across some blogs and articles by people who married young (Late teens to early twenties). Some of them wrote a testimony of their love for their spouse and why they felt it was important to get married when they did-- and are still married. Others wrote about the catastrophe their young wedlock turned out to be and have since moved on or are single again.


I find this interesting...and because this is MY fabulous and amazingal blog I'm going to share my two-cents.

(Our very first, official, date in April of 2004. Oh yes.)

I got married at what I consider young in this day and age. I was 22 when I got married and Jeff was 24.
I had met Jeff when I was almost 19 and he was almost 21. The first year that we knew each other was very hot and cold. Neither of us wanted to commit to a serious relationship, but neither of us could deny the attraction and the fact that we were crazy about each other.
When I married Jeff, I loved him. Very much.

But something weird happened to me as soon as we were pronounced man and wife. Reality started to creep into my veins and I realized how quickly I was going to have to grow up. It wasn't all about me now, it was about us and we. It was about we and working full-time and being separated from family and friends who I was used to seeing whenever I wanted. Now, I couldn't just go shopping whenever I wanted, I had to remember now that everything I did affected both of us, not just me.
The first year of our marriage was probably the hardest and I readily admit that.
Jeff worked nights. I worked long days. We almost never saw each other. We lived in an apartment with TERRIBLE neighbors who we (and by that I mean me) had to call the cops on all the time (they knew me on a first name basis). I was alone a lot. I didn't know anyone in the town we lived in. I missed my family. I missed my friends.
And I took it out on Jeff.
I started leaving on weekends to visit friends and family in other towns and I tried to find other ways to fill my time and the void of not having him with me.
In a sense, I think I tried to close him out a little bit and he didn't really know what to do about it so he started doing the same thing.
When I found out we were pregnant with Caderyn, I was so shocked and in disbelief that, at first, I cried.
Not because I was unhappy at the thought of having a child.
Not because I was unhappy at the thought of sharing this life with Jeff.
But because I felt this child was just a way to fill that loneliness when Jeff and I worked opposite schedules and never saw each other.
I never wanted that for my child.
But, let me tell you, that thought process ended pretty quickly. And by that, I mean like after a day I never thought about it again.
Our next year was filled with ups and downs, just like every marriage and relationship, but I began to notice there were more ups.
Jeff got a promotion and continued to work super, super hard (as he always does), but he also made an extra effort to try and be more available to me. We took a great trip to Phoenix together for Christmas and prepared for Caderyn's arrival and our second year of marriage.
Our second year or marriage was not perfect either, but it was better than our first.
Our third year was...hard again. Jeff still worked the night shifts and super, super long hours. He was home watching Caderyn during the days and running on empty from lack of sleep. I felt like I was doing everything around the house and I was also running on empty.
I still left town a lot, with Caderyn in tow, to get away from the loneliness and to be around people I loved since Jeff was working such odd hours. In return, to fill the void of his family being gone, Jeff started going downtown after his shift ended at midnight to unwind and talk to people. He couldn't come home and talk to me because I was usually asleep or I wasn't home.
A huge change in our relationship came after a rather large argument (yes, we have those) that involved how Jeff was still going downtown too much after work when he should be home with us. I was trying to make an effort to me more available to him and less like a mother to him (which I tend to do sometimes. I'm very bossy).
Shortly after that, Jeff made some phone calls and came to me with a plan.
He wanted to join the National Guard.
It was actually a fairly elaborate plan, but joining the National Guard was the very first step.
We sat down and talked and talked about it. I saw how excited he was and knew this was something I needed to support.
From the day we had that talk, things have just been easier.
Each of Jeff's decisions since then have been for the better. I know they may be hard now, but will they really seem all that bad two or three years from now?
He does this for us. To ensure that we will have a better future and life together and I support his endeavors because he is passionate about succeeding and providing.


So, yes, we married young. Sometimes I wonder what it would have been like if we'd waited another year or two. How would things have gone differently?
Looking back, I feel like we both still had a lot of growing up to do. We are still growing up for heavens sake! But, I also feel that if we hadn't gotten married when we did, we wouldn't be at this pivotal part in our life.
Jeff is back is school and doing ROTC all in another town during the long, long weeks. Yes, I miss him SO much, but I am confident in his ability to get the job done and keep his eyes on the prize. I am also confident that our relationship as partners and parents has never been stronger because of this growing we did together. We understand certain things about each other now that we had absolutely NO clue about when we were 22 and 24.

Getting married young was very hard and the road was not easy.
Getting married young involves a lot of sacrifices that you might not be ready to give up just yet.
Getting married young means you will have to learn to grow and change with each other for the better.
Getting married young was my choice and I wouldn't do it any other way.
I love my husband. I love how he has changed through the years.  I love him more today after everything we have been through and will continue to encounter together than I did the day I married him.

Getting married young is not for the faint of heart, and, in this day and age, marriage is not for everyone.
But I'm glad I found the one person I could walk through this life with who understands me and is headed in the same direction that I am.

23 WEEKS AND THAT LAZY CORGI OF MINE

  I love my iPhone these days.

 

Officially 23 weeks today (Thursday). There are only 17 weeks left until our new little man enters this world. Crazy! Feeling pretty good this week! That 3-day weekend really energized me. I think everyone should have 4-day work weeks. It would keep everyone happy...like me...and I'm pretty much a standard representation of everyone.
This week I switched up my schedule a little bit. I have now started showering and doing my hair at night. I put product in it and then let it air dry and braid it before bed. The result is usually a crazy cool texture in the morning and then I play around with it for a bit and usually curl it. I've been able to sleep in a little longer and I have time to do my makeup in the morning. I think a good move on my part!
So, the usual questionnaire:
How far along? 23 weeks
Weight gain/loss: You will never know. All you need to worry about is how I'm going to lose it.
Maternity clothes? Yeppers.
Stretch marks? My fair skinned curse. I am noticing the more my belly stretches, the less harsh they look. C'est la vie. Still lathering on the lotion every day and drinking water like it's going out of style to prevent new ones.
Sleep? Great this week (I'm knocking on wood as I say that)! I usually wake up once a night to go potty. It's usually some time between 1:00 a.m. and 3:00 a.m. when baby starts being pretty active.
Best moment this week? Sleeeeeeeep!
Food cravings: Rice Krispies cereal with tons of blueberries mixed in. And, sadly, cake. I'm trying to be really good about this one though. And still and always pizza. I swear I could eat it everyday. Casseroly (new word I made up!) type meals with stuff all mixed together.
Gender: Baby G is a boy!
Belly button in or out? In, but I noticed that it is looking super stretched all of the sudden.
Movement? Not a ton. I've been pretty busy this week and usually don't get the chance to sit down until around 9:30 p.m, but he has given me a few good thumps to remind me he's there.
What I miss? Going to Zumba. Having smaller legs and butt...they just look so big this week. 
What I'm looking forward to: Being a family of four and having the summer off with my boys and all of my family! That will just be the best thing ever!
Weekly wisdom: This link has kept me laughing all week long. My all time laugh your pants off one: "Hey mama. It's cool. I know that pooping on the delivery table is completely natural." I about lost it when I read that one.
Milestones: Baby boy weighs more than a pound and a half right now and is about 8 1/2 inches long. His face is fully formed, but he is still lacking all of that cute baby fat. Baby can hear me breathing, any tummy bubbles I might have, my voice and any outside voices.
And now, back by popular demand, yet another rendition of That Lazy Corgi of Mine:

Kiss your mother with that mouth? 

I am sooooo neglected 

I can seeeeee you 

Matchmaker Matchmaker make me a match, find me a find, catch me a catch 

Serisouly woman? No more pictures, I'm trying to sleep on your couch pillows.



FOR THE DAY OF MINE BIRTH

Last night while I was taking the most gloriously hot shower it hit me.
I am only 26 for, like, one more week.
And then I will be 27.
Eeeep.
That's like a whole new level of 20s my peeps.
Now when I say, "Hi! I'm a 27-year-old married mother of two"...it's going to sound...so...official.

But in honor of one of my favorite days of the year--the day of my birth--I'm going to tell everyone what I want.
Oh yeah.

So because I am pregnant, I really DON'T want any clothes or money for clothes. No thank you.
I also don't want any shoes, because I noticed last night that my feet were swollen.

I would really like a gift card to The Target, the Tar-jay. I could spend oh so much money there.

I would also maybe like a little bit of cash to spend in Phoenix when I visit over Easter. I kind of want to buy a cute little baby thing or two.

I would REALLY, REALLY like a spa day. Think massage, facial and the works. Most days I struggle to feel pretty in this expanding body that harbors yet another man-fetus, so anything that will make me feel pretty or relaxed would be amazing.

A cupcake. Duh.

A date night with my husband. I haven't had one of those in awhile. I would like to go out to dinner with him, ice cream and then a movie. Please someone find it in the kindness of their hearts to allow this.

And that's pretty much it. :)

Any maybe some pizza. That's what I crave these days. Pizza and a bowl of Rice Krispies cereal with tons of blueberries thrown in.

yum

I SAW IT ON PINTEREST

For Valentine's Day, I remember my parents always did something special for my brother and I.
I wanted to do the same thing for Caderyn, so I resolved to make him a yummy breakfast.

I made a French Toast Bake and it was super, super easy and really yummy.

Source

I will definitely be making this again.
You will need:

• 1 loaf of Texas Toast
• 1 stick of butter
• 1/2 cup of brown sugar
•  4 eggs
•  1 1/2 c of milk
• 1 tsp of vanilla

What to do:

• Melt stick of butter in a saucepan and add brown sugar. Stir, stir, stir until they are well mixed and then pour this mixture all over the bottom of your 9x13 baking dish (rectangle). Spread it around with a spatula if you need to.
• Layer your baking dish with six slices of Texas Toast. It should cover almost the entire bottom of the pan.
• Mix eggs, milk and vanilla together
• Spoon half of this above mixture over the first layer of toast.
• Then, add another layer of Texas Toast, so six more slices
• Pour the rest of the mixture over the top.
• Cover with tin foil and set in your fridge overnight.
• Wake up and preheat your oven to 350 degrees and put that deliciousness in the over for 45 minutes.

What I would do differently:

• I might do 1 3/4 cup of milk and one more egg to make the mixture just a little more dense. Mine had some dry spots.

I served this with strawberries and sausage and LOVED it.

CAN YOU 'EAR ME NOW?

Our weekend was very low key.

The main event was Monday when Caderyn had tubes put in his ears.

Pre-surgery

Post surgery 

Here are my thoughts as a mother:

1. We didn't make a big deal about Caderyn going in. The night before we told Caderyn he was going to the doctor in the morning to have his ears fixed and that they would feel much better. We told him he would get to meet lots of doctors and nurses and they would be his friends (he loves making new friends). We also told him they would put a mask on his face and then he would wake up and feel a little funny for awhile but that we would be right there with him.

This might sound like a lot for a two year old to process, but he seemed to soak it all in.

He was very friendly and bubbly to everyone there (he isn't shy!).

2. Bring some books and toys from home and a comfort item. This definitely kept any anxiety or boredom down before the surgery.

3. Refer to the gown they have to wear as a "costume." Caderyn thought this was hilarious.

4. It was so hard to let the nurse take him and walk down the hall and through the surgery doors. I just about lost it.

5. The ear tube surgery is literally like ten minutes so don't expect to be waiting for long. Caderyn's was about 15 minutes because he had SO much fluid in both of his ears.

6. They bring him right in and put him in your arms while he is still knocked out. It was freaky because he was so floppy.

7. All children come out of anesthesia differently. Caderyn flopped and flailed a lot and then cried and cried and drooled for about 30 minutes. That was hard too. You just have to stay calm and keep talking in a soothing tone and touching to let him know its you and you're there. Caderyn likes it when I tickle the back of his neck so I tried to do that when he would calm down a little. They are usually really out of it.

8. They bleed from their ears a bit, that is normal.

9. The nurses said he would sleep really well for both his nap and then at bedtime because of the gas. LIES! My child almost didn't take a nap. He did sleep okay last night.

10. I was very impressed with how quickly it went. Caderyn is up and running today.

HAPPY FRIDAY

Oh weekend of thine dreams! Thou hast deprived me for too long. How I pined for you. How I craved thine's attention.

Jeff is home (hooray!).
We will be cleaning.
Snuggling
Getting new brakes on the Boo (the blue Subaru)
I will be getting a manicure and pedicure
Studying for tests (Jeff)
Writing stories as a freelancer (Me)
Snuggling
Probably watching Supernatural (Jeff) and freaking out (me).

This here artwork is something I drew for my friend. We were brainstorming "get rich quick" ideas and thought our town needed a place where people could get both pizza and cupcakes WHENEVER they wanted them. We called our imaginary eatery The Fluffy Pepperoni. One day this dream will come true...one day.

22 WEEKS

For Valentine's Day this year, I managed to contract the pink of the eye aka pink eye.

So that's why you all get the special treat of seeing me in my glasses.

The last picture above was taken today, and, as you can see, I am pink eye free.

How far along? 22 weeks

Weight gain/loss: None of your business. I'm seeing a difference in my arms this week. I'm kind of bummed because I've been trying to work my guns out a lot. Oh well.

Maternity clothes? Oh yes. Pretty much everything in my closet is maternity with the exception of a few things.

Stretch marks? Probably until the day I die. My fair skinned curse. Lathering on the lotion to not get any new ones.

Sleep? Last night wasn't great. It's kind of hit or miss. I usually wake up around 1:00 a.m. and 3:00 p.m. to pee. Baby G was kicking me around 3:00 a.m. last night so I couldn't fall back to sleep very quickly.

Best moment this week? Pink eye (insert sarcasm). Valentine's Day was really nice with Caderyn. I made him a yummy breakfast and he got some special treats and then he told me I was his "special girl." This made me smile. Also, I'm noticing baby really likes certain foods, like cereal and pizza. I get big thumps if I'm eating one of these.

Food cravings: Right now...I could really eat like a huge plate of Thai food with noodles and rice all mixed in and a really spicy curry sauce. Lord, that sound so amazingly good right now. I've also been craving Fruit Loops. I can tell I want them because I can smell them even when they aren't around.
Gender: A busy little boy.
Belly button in or out? In. Never has gone out...
Movement? Not as much as last week, but definitely lots of movement. As I type this, he is fluttering under my right side ribs.
What I miss? Pretty much the same as last week: sleeping on my stomach, a good beer or glass of wine on a Friday. Feeling in shape. Oh, and being able to take an Aleve when I have a headache.

What I'm looking forward to: Seeing Baby G's face. Having Jeff home from school and my parents here for the birth and entire summer! Seeing how quickly I can focus on losing the weight. Having my two boys together and bonding. I'm actually not all that worried about Caderyn, I'm worried about me sharing my focus between two boys.

Weekly wisdom: It is hard but it is worth it.

Milestones: Jeff got to feel Baby G kicking. He kept his hand there and just smiled for most of the night. This week Baby G is around 8 inches long and just over a pound of cute little baby fat. Caderyn was a long baby and I think his brother will be long as well.